英语笑话(二)(3)

我追求了一个女生，她不答应。后来我听说她喜欢打《英雄联盟》，为了追她，我也开始打起《英雄联盟》来……沉迷于游戏两个月之后，已经把她忘得一干二净了。
My husband came to visit me at my office and I wanted to show our love in front of my colleagues. So I got him some coffee and passed him some tissues to wipe the sweat. He looked up at me and asked in pain, “Honey, did you do something wrong?”
老公好不容易来我办公室一次，我想在众人面前表现得夫妻恩爱一点，就又倒咖啡又是递纸巾给他擦汗……他抬头痛苦地问我：“老婆，你是不是做了对不起我的事情啊？”
Early this morning I saw my ex-girlfriend fighting with her boyfriend on the street. Thinking about our days together, I couldn’t hold it anymore. I ran to the boy and slapped him twice, saying, “Didn’t you have breakfast this morning? Why can’t you hit her harder? There are bricks on the ground; can’t you just pick one up as a weapon? Are you blind or something?”
早上，在街上我看到了我的前女友和她男朋友在打架。想起我和她之前的点点滴滴，我就按捺不住了，冲上去就给了那男的两耳光：“你早上没吃饭呀？不会用点力呀？地上有砖你看不到呀？你瞎啊？”